How to increase self-esteem and self-confidence - 5 reasons for low self-esteem and 7 simple ways to increase it

Many articles, magazines, and books on psychology have been written on how to increase self-esteem and self-confidence. But still, many aspiring entrepreneurs (and not only) are concerned about this issue. Therefore, at the request of our readers of richpro.ru, we decided to write this detailed article about self-esteem without water and in fact. So let's go!

Long gone are the old misconceptions that in order to be happy you need:

• Believe and obey parents;
• dance around the fire and worship the gods;
• build communism;
• and so on and in the same spirit (underline as necessary).

With the development of psychological science, only one thing becomes obvious - only man himself can make himself happy, apart from, of course, force majeure circumstances.

So, from this article you will learn:

1. What is self-esteem and what functions does it have, etc.;
2. How to love yourself and increase your self-esteem - advice from psychologists and experts;
3. How to become self-confident and happy with your life;
4. Reasons for low self-esteem, tests, videos, etc.

1. What is self-esteem and how does it affect our lives 😎

The correctness of self-assessment is a rather complicated thing. This is the same waterline of the ship in the open sea, which should not nor rise above, nor fall below. Before embarking on a long voyage, you must understand that without adequate self-esteem, nothing will come of it. How does this happen?

The human subconscious mind builds itself, relying on many factors from the first minutes of life.

In order to understand the mechanism of formation of self-esteem, it is necessary to understand that:

• a person is never alone - he is a gregarious animal and must be in society (sociopaths are a deviation, a disease);
• each word and deed of others in relation to the personality automatically affects her, forcing in one way or another to evaluate herself;
• for the most part, a person builds an opinion of himself perceiving himself as “strangers”, not having the ability and desire to analyze his actions independently and give them a final assessment.

In the end, it turns out that self-esteem - this is combined information about all assessments of your personality, performed independently or on the basis of a different opinion, which forms your idea of ​​your qualities and shortcomings.

This can be stated in another way: self-esteem - this is the definition of one’s place in the ranking of all people in the world, which is based on one’s own and imposed priorities. It looks different for every person.

For example, a blonde who has never read a primer in her life can have a high self-esteem, since her society gives her only positive information about her personality, her virtues coincide with those that are in the midst of her surroundings and she looks like her society demands it. That is, from all sides it surrounds positive and a small fraction negativity she simply does not notice / ignores.

On the other hand, there may be yesterday’s engineer student, who graduated from the university, got a job and, due to fright, already made a couple of minor mistakes, which were quite loyal.

It will seem to him that in comparison with more experienced colleagues he is a jerk, he will never succeed. Here, mom also says that he is a mediocre son, because he forgot to take out the trash in the morning, dad says that instead of higher education he just had to go to the mine, because there "they pay normal money and you don’t need to think with a stupid head." To all this is added the standard appearance and the dream of girls from the TV.

All this typical example of low self-esteemwhich is formed by others. The young man himself has nothing to do with it - rather, he simply moves along the stream, which forms his environment.

Without changing anything in his life, he is unlikely to achieve anything in it.

If you do not pull yourself together, such problems await him:

• failures at work due to constant nervous tension and self-flagellation from the series “I won’t succeed, others will do it better”;
• lack of growth on the career ladder due to fear of responsibility, thoughts similar to "I can’t handle it, it’s not for me, I’m not capable of it";
• constant fear of losing a job, feeling tired, depressed, possibly alcoholism, the desire to leave reality in an illusory comfortable world;
• the impossibility of an adequate relationship with the girls, as the tightness and complexes will also appear here, there will be thoughts from the series "she is too beautiful, I do not earn so much, I am ugly, I am not worthy of her."

This is not a complete list of those trouble and life problemsthat are born from poor self-esteem, the inability to work with her.

At an older age, it can be problems with raising children, communicating with them. There may also be significant troubles with self-realization, a desire to open a business and all in the same spirit.

The young man mentioned is just an example, everyone has a reason to think badly about themselves - no one is perfect. It is important to adequately assess your personality as a whole and from this already build relationships with the outside world.

You must also understand that it’s not only money and career.

A person with low self-esteem initially cannot be happy for the following reasons:

• constant fear;
• enduring nervous tension;
• periodic depression;
• aggravated stress when exposed to adverse factors;
• the impossibility of self-realization;
• constant stiffness, up to physical movements;
• lack of confidence in their innocence;
• compliance with the outside world, weak character;
• inability to start something new;
• closed, cramped speech;
• constant digging.

All these are signs that you do not have a happy future, because no one will come and change your life with a wave of a magic wand.

In order to look confidently into the future, you need to work on yourself and not be afraid to change. Without this, everything will remain in place, and dreams will turn into collapse.

We also recommend reading the article - “How to attract good luck and money in your life?”

The main functions of self-esteem

Exist three main functionsthat make adequate self-esteem so necessary:

• Protective - a solid self-esteem will allow you to be sure of what you think and do, it ensures a stable opinion about yourself, and therefore a smooth emotional background, less exposure to stress;
• Regulatory - helps to make the most correct and timely choices regarding your personality;
• Developing - the correct assessment of your personality gives a strong impetus to its development.

An ideal situation is that in which a person absolutely independently evaluates his qualities and capabilities and adequately understands what he is good at and what is bad at. From this, he plans his life - what he will do, what to learn, and so on. Of course, this impossible.

From early childhood to late old age, everything around tries to influence us, our assessment of ourselves. At the very beginning we are characterized parentsafter peers and friends, then added to this teachers and professors, Colleagues, bosses and so on.

As a result, we do not even evaluate ourselves, but compare the opinions of others about ourselves with the ideals imposed by society. Where is it up to adequate self-esteem, some of the information received does not apply to reality at all!

But only after correctly assessing your abilities, you can understand in which direction you need to develop and what in general you are.

In this situation, it’s bad any deviation. An overestimated opinion of yourself will entail many painful mistakes in life, although it is rarer. It is much more common low self-esteem, which destroys people's lives, does not open up, show the maximum of its capabilities. The neglected form of this problem leads to an inferiority complex, and therefore to the destruction of the individual.

In essence, this one of the main reasons that a person cannot make money. Unsure of himself, he rushes from corner to corner, is afraid to take a risky step in his opinion or the thoughts of others, as a result, he despairs and continues to live from one miserable salary to another.

Moreover, in such cases, you don’t start your own business, because the necessary qualities for this: the activity, self confidencereadiness to risk and accept decisions come from true, adequate self esteem.

We also recommend reading - “How to become rich?”

Lack of self confidence takes the energy of the individual, fetters his actions, which leads to a terrible state when a person is only able to think or dream of action, and not decisively take up the realization of his desires.

2. How to love yourself and what will happen if you do not 💋

Love yourself does not mean to become narcissistic. In fact, this is due to self-esteem. Only a person who is able to evaluate himself to highlight all his strengths and weaknesses can really honestly and fairly treat his personality.

How to learn to love yourself and increase self-esteem for women and men

So, how to love yourself and increase self-esteem?

Having a low self-esteem, you will only see everything negative in yourself, which of course will not lead to anything good.

Justified self-love based on your merits and constant work over defects there is a guarantee that others will treat you well.

Really hard to love a man who do not appreciate and does not respect yourself. It is more a pity than something more. Being competitive in business or choosing a spouse, or much more, is only possible with high self-esteem and proper attitude. Depressed and clogged personality cannot be realized in the modern world.

The big mistake is to constantly look for flaws in yourself. The more you do this, the more difficult it will be for you to make any, even the most insignificant decision.

Self-criticism - This is excellent, but it should be balanced with praise, forgiveness and self-respect.

In our psyche there are enough specific defense mechanisms against pain, discomfort and various threats. Our consciousness is only the visible part of a huge iceberg that hides the subconscious. It is also not homogeneous and consists of various personalities "getting along in one body." Each of them affects consciousness, constantly expressing its desires and needs on the body.

Suppressing the natural desire to be happyBy developing an inferiority complex, you give the opportunity to crawl out to the darkest corners of your psyche.

This can lead to various psychologically deviations of varying severity. A calm person will be doomed to eternal depression (read the article - “How to Get Out of Depression”), and the sensitive nature may show signs of schizophrenia, various mania and other extremely serious diseases. Of course, these are very rare cases, but there is a risk.

3. How to determine that you have low self-esteem?

Here is a list of signs by which you can determine whether a person has low self-esteem:

• a large amount of criticism addressed to him, both on the case and out of the blue;
• dissatisfaction with any actions and results;
• too strong reaction to extraneous criticism;
• painful reaction to the opinion expressed about yourself, even a positive one;
• fear of doing something wrong;
• indecision, it takes a long time to think before doing anything;
• unhealthy jealousy;
• envy, especially when others have achieved something;
• an obsessive desire to please, literally lie in front of others;
• hatred of one’s surroundings, causeless anger at others;
• constant excuses;
• desire to defend oneself from everything in the world;
• enduring pessimism;
• a lot of negativity in everything.

Low self-esteem makes a person suffer much more from failures. Any problem is temporary, especially if you start to solve it in time.

If a person is insecure, then he will aggravate the trouble until he becomes insoluble, as a result, will give up and leave everything on gravitythat will bring problems in all areas of life.

Such an approach on an ongoing basis will exacerbate self-esteem, make you feel like a jerk, and eventually hate yourself.

Society is very sensitive to this and as soon as your negative attitude towards yourself becomes noticeable, those around you will start to feel worse about you. The farther, the more that ultimately ends in alienation and seclusion, a deeply unhappy existence, lack of money and personal life, psycho-emotional disorders.

There is an absolute pattern: start respecting yourself and others will respect you.

Success factors - self-confidence and high self-esteem

4. Overpriced self-esteem and self-confidence 👍 - the most important factors for achieving success

Self love - this is not a flaw, not arrogance, and so on. It is worth distinguishing between narcissism and a healthy respect for one’s personality.

The most important thing - correlate your opinion with reality. If you really know how to cut wood, love yourself for it, be proud of it, even boast.

If you just started doing this - value yourself for striving for a new, desire to do something with hands. In every action you can find positive parties and negative. Love yourself for the first and adequately relate to the second.

Only in this case, the people who surround you will see your positive sides, will they start you appreciate and respect. If everything is the other way around, and you will look for more and more shortcomings in your work, others will do it. And believe me, they will find them.

More you will confident, the more people reach for you. Moreover, those who have a higher level of self-esteem than yours, and those who have it lower. They will want to talk more closely, start a collaboration, just talk with an interesting, confident person who is not afraid and not embarrassed to tell what he sees fit or to do as he thinks right.

Strength attracts everyone - from small to large, which will make you not only popular, but also more content with your life.

Signs of good, high self-esteem:

• the physical body is not a painful ugly shell, but a given from nature;
• self-confidence, their actions and words;
• mistakes are not obstacles in the way, but a way to learn more;
• criticism is useful information that does not affect self-esteem;
• compliments are pleasant and do not cause strong emotions;
• calmly speak with all people, do not feel awkward when communicating with strangers;
• each expressed opinion is valuable, but does not fundamentally affect the opinion of the person himself;
• take care of the state of the body;
• worry about their emotional balance, correct it if necessary;
• constantly harmonious development, without leaps and unrealistic tasks;
• complete what has been started, achieve success in this and are not afraid of it.

Believe in yourself, respect your own self - this is the basis for achieving any goal, including the fundamental one - to be happy. This will help you grow above yourself today, forget about those troubles and disgusting feelings that you experienced at the bottom of your own self-esteem.

In the territory of the former Soviet Union, many representatives of the older generation have big problems with self-esteem. At that time, it was extremely unpopular, since the leader was the common good, and not everyone’s happiness. Next generation 90s Also, she did not receive enough adequate positive information about herself from the world due to the difficult situation in the country, lack of money, dangerous criminal situation.

At this time, it's time to forget about it and think about your own well-being. In order to change your self-esteem, you need to work on your personality.

This will be the very qualitative change in life that you have dreamed about so much.

5. Low self-esteem - 5 main causes of self-doubt

Mouse races, in which a person has been involved since birth, force him to form a definite opinion about himself. As a result, to the beginning of a conscious life, we often get unlucky and sad a young man who understands perfectly well that a lot of troubles and the need to work are waiting for him and his complexes. Why is this so?

Reason # 1. A family

If you are wondering where the person gets his opinion about himself, the first correct answer is the family. Most of our psychological attitudes we receive at a very young age. This is due to the fact that during physiological development, emotional formation also occurs.

In a different way, while we are growing, our parents and the environment lays the foundation of our future personality brick by brick.

It is logical to assume that the opinion of oneself created in the childhood period will remain with us for many years, and maybe for a lifetime. It is good if parents understand this and are responsible for what they say to the child and how they do it. However, this does not always happen.

For example, according to parents, a child from kindergarten constantly makes mistakes. The progress of parental humiliation looks like this:

• Built from a designer a beautiful house? And who will clean it?
• Won the game with snowballs from the guys from the neighboring yard? Yes, you’re all wet, you’ll get sick, but we don’t have any money!
• Got 5 on physical education? And where is the math really stupid?
• What do you mean, did you like this girl? Her dad is a gardener, but this is not prestigious!

So, every day, parents impose on the child that he can not do anything right. The kid ceases to believe that he is able to do something with his hands, have fun, choose a partner, company and so on.

Against this background, self-love can not be born in any way, who can respect and appreciate such an awkward creature? Then, after about twenty years, parents are surprised to find that their child is a failure, has achieved nothing in life, is lonely and sad and blames it ... him, because they put so much effort into him, and he, ungrateful... and all in the same vein.

What should a person do in this situation? Of course, work on yourself, increase self-esteem and strive for happiness. Everything is possible, the main thing is to want.

Parents should remember that criticism is a dangerous educational tool that can lead to painful consequences. It is worth knowing that you are growing a separate person who needs to be confident in his decisions and actions, has his own opinion, be able to make decisions, and not follow you like a limp as an extension of your body and mind.

The best situation for the baby is good and affectionate mom who always calm and happy. The father must be demanding, have serious authority and, most importantly, he treats the child fairly at any age.

It is also worth paying attention to every baby in the family, even if there are a lot of them. The so-called "younger brother syndrome", when the younger is reproached with the success of the older - worsethat you can think of to form a healthy self-esteem.

As family for baby - the center of the universe, it is worth paying attention to his ego. If you feel that your self-esteem is falling, raise it.

It does not need much - just rightly praise him several times a day, and he will go to bed more happy. Encourage him to do what he does best, and gently point out flaws, not criticize. So the child’s self-esteem will inevitably rise and ensure his stability to life and a happy future.

Reason number 2. Failures at an early age

From early childhood on our way there are failures. This is inevitable for every person, because we live in a completely not perfect world. An adult with a stable psyche is usually quite calm about failures, can overcome them and extract useful information from them, but this is not always the case with children.

At a very young age, even if you did not remember the failure, it is possible that it is in the depths of your subconscious and whispers all the time: “don’t do anything, it won’t work anyway, I’m always behind you.” This must be fought.

Over time, if you work on your personality, these memories will come up, will be very painful and unpleasant, however, analyzing them in detail and realizing that your mistake is very insignificant and should not affect you subsequently - you will get rid of a significant burden on your heart.

From the time you remember perfectly all your troubles, working with this is much easier. After digging in consciousness, you will surely find a couple dozens moments that oppress you from school. Failure of a desk mate, teacher's unflattering expression, rude father comment, competition failure, physics deuce - all these are examples of heavy load that lowers your self esteem and takes away positive energy for eternal torment over long-lived problems.

All this from youth forms the consciousness of a loser who simply cannot achieve something in life, and this is a lie - everyone is capable of it.

Reason number 3. Life passivity

The formation of personality begins in childhood and in the first stages does not require any effort from us. However, the older we get, the more this situation changes.

TO 15 years our personality will not move forward a centimeter unless you try to do this. That is, over time, more and more willpower will be required from each person in order to at least remain at the original level, for development it will be necessary to do more and more.

If a child is depressed since childhood, is not used to working on himself and developing, in adulthood he will belong to the so-called gray mass.

This substance in society is characterized by the fact that its unit:

• does not want to develop;
• constantly postpones important matters for later (procrastinates). About what procrastination is, read in one of our articles;
• does not dream of more;
• Does not take personal responsibility either for himself or for his family;
• accustomed to poverty / low income;
• Does not care for himself, his appearance;
• believes that everything new is terrible and superfluous in his life;
• Does not know how to be satisfied or unsatisfied - emotions are completely inert.

There is a famous physicist saying that a man without willpower is just a vertical puddle. It is these individuals that make up the gray mass. This is not an example of poor self-esteem, but its complete absence.

No aspirations, no desires, perpetual lack of money and lack of any vivid impressionsthat are able to dispel gray reality.

This is a rather sad sight that destroys thousands of lives, including those children who grow up in such families. Increase self-esteem in this case, it is vital for women and men.

If this is not done, a happy, bright, full of emotions life will pass by, leaving shards of poverty and an ever depressing mood.

Reason number 4. Environment

A large number of people surround us all. Some of them are successful, others are not very successful, and others do not want to be such. If you decide to take everything from life, to make yourself a happy, self-confident person, you should acquire the appropriate environment.

Signs of an unhealthy society:

• constant baseless philosophizing, verbiage;
• criticism of everything in the world, from government to neighbors, especially baseless or meaningless;
• inertia and lack of initiative, for example, if you cannot persuade your friends to go to a concert or to a movie;
• constant gossip, condemnation of others behind them;
• get rich quick planning without any action or effort;
• a large amount of alcohol, cigarettes and other bad habits.

The lack of desire to develop, work and generally try in life is quite contagious. In such a company you feel no worse than everyone, however it relaxes, requires a lot of time and emotions, pulls to the bottom. This is energy vampirism, which is difficult, even impossible to fight. If you can - leave such a company or environment at all, if not - just minimize communication.

The best society for aspiring to grow is people have already achieved something. Don't know how to get to know them? Try going to places you've never been to before. Usually this librariesbook the shops, theatersThematic institutions, workshops, trainings and so on.

Reason number 5. Problems with appearance

A strong factor, especially in adolescence, is appearance. If it has any defects, then even with the right approach of relatives to education, low self-esteem can be formed on the basis of the opinions of peers, teachers, and so on.

The most common example in this case is excess weight. Offensive nicknames, lack of attention of girls / boys, contemptuous attitude of some adults - all this naturally affects the personality of the child.

If this manifested itself in adulthood, then a person will not demonstrate his resentment so clearly, but the pain from this will not decrease.

In order to change this, you can try to fix the defect. For example, if this is a diet, then the whole family should sit on it so that the child does not feel impaired. If change is not possible, the child needs help to put up with this situation and develop in a different direction.

In the world there are many charismatic and attractive fat men and absolutely nobody interesting thin people.

6. How to increase self-esteem and confidence - 7 ways 📚

Having figured out what self-esteem is, why it is needed and what affects it, its formation can begin to how to work with it, namely how to raise it.

It’s not enough just to realize that you are not evaluating yourself correctly; you also need to be able to change the situation. Below are a few interesting and effective ways to increase self-esteem and confidence.

Method number 1. Environment

The society in which you revolve determines your essence. It is important for everyone not to be the last. In a company in which no one has achieved anything, you feel comfortable, because everyone is the same as you.

Now imagine that you find yourself in a circle of friends where one bought a new car yesterday, the second opened a new branch of his store, the third recently graduated from the university. At the same time, you hardly graduated from college, and you can't get a job anywhere.

Here we recommend reading the article - “How to behave at an interview when applying for a job?”

What will you feel? Of course, unpleasant. In addition, you will receive a powerful, significant impetus to development, the desire to do something significant for your life and career. At first you will feel awkward, but over time you will realize that you are changing for the better with this company.

In addition, you will get rid of the ever-depressing social circle that pulls you to the bottom and makes fun of all your timid undertakings.

A strong and successful person will never become, laughing at someone who is only trying his hand. On the contrary, he will help and prompt, even support, if necessary.

Look for a suitable social circle that will make you work on yourself.

Method number 2. Literature, trainings, films

Having dealt with the environment, proceed to decisive steps, namely, take up reading books on working on yourself, increase self-esteem. This list is useful to you:

• Brian Tracy "Self-Assessment";
• Sharon Vegshida-Cruz "How much are you? How to learn to love and respect yourself";
• The Fascination of Femininity by Helen Andeline;
• Louise Hay "Heal Your Life."

Next, follow your goal by watching various videos about this on the Internet. This way you will see the opinions of other people. Their experience and impressions of the work done, and this is a powerful motivation.

Next stage - attend seminars and practices. People gather here who want to change and coaches who are able to give them this. Thus, you change the environment and get the desired information. This is an effective way that allows you to kill two birds with one stone in one fell swoop.

Method number 3. Comfort zone is really an enemy

No matter how strange it may sound, but for now you comfortably and calmly in the world in which you exist it very bad for your personality. Well-established rules of life will force you stiffen and stand still at one place. Only by doing something new can you develop.

In fact, it only seems to you that you already have all the best. There, beyond the bounds of your invisible cell, lives and rages wonderful and fascinating a world that is filled not with difficulties and troubles, but with incredible adventures, new stories and acquaintances.

As soon as you throw your fears into the furnace, it will reveal itself to you, instill a sense of self-confidence and show a lot of the brightest events that you could not even think of.

What needs to be done to leave the "comfort zone"? Analyze where your time goes. How many hours a week do you watch TV, how much do you drink, play games and so on. Reduce this time by three hours in seven days and devote them to something new. What they always wanted: sculpt from clay, sew a new dress, plant a flower, go to the circus / cinema / theater. The more active, the better. Over time, a bright life will drag you in, and you will forget about the mediocre talkative box and other garbage items.

Method number 4. Down with self-criticism!

If you stop eating yourself alive redundant self-criticism, you can immediately perform three extremely important tasks, which in other ways will take you a lot of time and effort.

FirstlyYou will get plenty of free energy. All the forces that you spent on self-discipline and the search for reasons for it can be directed to more pleasant and useful actions. For example, reading fascinating books with a relaxing story or writing poems, knitting, planting flowers and so on.

Secondly, begin to perceive yourself as a holistic person who has his own personality. Yes, you do not look like that Vasya, Einstein or Alain Delon. Do not need! Be yourself, and do not participate in an eternal, alien competition in which someone has already won first places.

Thirdly, you will begin to notice in yourself not only negative, but also positive aspects. Each one has something good, something that he knows how to do. Discover it, isolate and educate, improve, cultivate, without wasting time and energy. This is what will be the best investment in yourself!

What painful mistakes you would not encounter, do not allow yourself to be sad over them for more than an hour. Having suffered a little, force yourself to be happy again, and take failure into service as an experience.

Method number 5. Physical exercise

So physical dislikes by many greatly affect our emotional state. To increase self-esteem, buying a gym membership will be able to do more than many trainings.

This is because:

• during sports, a wonderful hormone dopamine is released in a person, which excites our brain and gives a pleasant encouragement, colloquially it is also called the hormone of joy;
• you bring your body, and therefore your appearance in full order, so that over time you can be proud of it and respect yourself for the work done;
• even the classes themselves are important without a result, because in the process of performing each exercise you overdo laziness, complexes and other troubles;
• Improving well-being gives and develops self-confidence and your actions, at every step - it’s easier for you to move and feel, it’s easier to persuade yourself to start doing something.

This is a great way to improve the quality of life for people with a sedentary lifestyle and the same work. Spending the whole day in a stuffy office, you should unwind, but without going to drink beer at the bar. It’s more likely to be detrimental to you, but sport on the contrary, it will update and make it more cheerful.

A heavy person with a heavy and unattractive body cannot feel good in the company of slender and healthy people. This is fertile ground for the development of complexes, lowering self-esteem and other troubles.

Among other things, sports will help to make New acquaintances with motivated people who can take you teach and show on the example that any changes are possible, which also has a beneficial effect on your psyche.

Method number 6. Subconscious programming

You can influence your consciousness with the help of another, no less interesting and effective tool - programming. In psychology, this is called affirmation. Remember your computer. You give him a command, he processes it and takes the requested action. The same thing with our subconscious, only a little more complicated. You can’t just say: “make me happy and confident.”

The code, command is memorized or recorded on the recorder. It should sound like a solid, realized fact. For example, “I am confident in myself”, “girls like me”, “I can have what I want without much effort” and all in the same spirit. There shouldn’t be many such phrases, they should be repeated in the playlist or just silently for about two minutes.

These affirmations and they will be the very installation in the subconscious, the command for the computer that will convince your subconscious of what you need. Want to be confident - please convince the hidden sides of your brain in this and it will remake the entire conscious part on its own so that you become completely independent and can easily make decisions.

There is one rule here - you need to do this regularly, even after you feel the change. Continue until you are surprised to find that the listening affirmations have already come true.

Remember, that these words should have an exceptionally positive effect on your personality, not form double-valued ones and not cause doubts. What you convince yourself of should only be of use, without negative effects, because it will not be easy to “convince” the subconscious mind back.

Method number 7. Remember your victories

Never neglect what has already been done. This is important for your consciousness, and for the subconscious and for a good mood. There is always something to praise yourself for, and if this is not enough, you will begin to subconsciously strive to do something good for this. Even if you praise yourself.

To operate this mechanism, set up a victory book. It is necessary to write down everything that you consider a good deed, useful action and so on. Any little things or minor victories - all this is very important for your self-esteem, a sense of need in the world.

This might look like this:

• had breakfast on time;
• took laundry from the laundry;
• bought his beloved wife several roses;
• pleased his daughter with a game of herring;
• earned an award thanks to a well-written report;
• three times a week went to the gym;
• lost 300 grams.

As you can see, achievements can be any if they brought someone joy or moral satisfaction. For several months, you can collect an impressive collection that will warm your soul on cold evenings.

Write this in your personal notebook and in difficult moments when you cannot find the strength in yourself complete some difficult task or to attend an extracurricular meeting at work, reread several pages of the diary.

Guaranteed your mood will rise, you will remember how many positive emotions your efforts brought to you and your loved ones, and this is a powerful impetus to defeat all the troubles in the world.

Using these methods to increase self-esteem requires regularity and care. Carefully monitor your condition and thoughts, try to highlight the most successful of them, watch how you change.

This will help to better know yourself, learn to communicate with the inner self, control your life.

7. Self-confidence training - we overcome the opinions of society

The society that surrounds us, as we already understood, seriously affects our self-esteem. If you attach too much importance to it, then it is quite capable of destroying the personality.

Of course, criticism is important. Our loved ones show us our mistakes, demonstrate moments in which, in their opinion, we did wrong and that’s good. It is called healthy relationships.

However let it fully define your personality badly. Each person must independently decide what is good in his life and what is not, and how in the end he will act in a particular situation.

First of all, you should not think about what others will say about you. First decide what you think about it, and try to perceive the rest of the information as a background, a second time.

Try to make the public opinion depend on yours, and not vice versa. There are some interesting exercises for this.

A little circus. This is just a physical exercise will require serious psychological strength. Look in the closet for something ridiculous - an old long tie, funny pants, everything that seems funny to you. Now put it on and boldly go outside. Go shopping, go to the movies, and so on. It’s not worth doing this at work - they may misunderstand, otherwise - complete expanse. However, do not overdo it, first take less provocative things and eventually wear something more fun so as not to immediately injure your psyche.

This exercise works this way. Your subconscious mind keeps a lot of complexes that are associated with its appearance. The more you leave the comfort zone, that is, to dress differently, the more your subconscious will independently destroy established complexes and make your consciousness, and therefore life freer.

More public. This exercise is simple. The more you speak publicly, the more refined this skill will be. Speaking in front of a large number of people requires composure, quality training, and willpower.

This will help you learn how to concentrate and complete the task quickly, while being responsible for the result. In addition, it will raise you in the eyes of the authorities, it will perfectly recommend among a large audience.

Perform these two exercises and be firm in your opinion.

8. How to find yourself and learn how to manage your self-esteem

Much has been said about self-esteem. Perhaps it will be difficult for you to immediately perceive and implement the entire situation received.

For this there is 5 golden rulesthat should be printed and hung on the refrigerator. Constantly reminding and reading them will do the job for you. On a subconscious level, your brain will perceive them as attitudes and will facilitate the period of transformation into a successful person.

• No need to compare yourself and others!
• No need to scold yourself for mistakes!
• Surround yourself with a positive!
• Learn to love what you do!
• Prefer the action of any passivity!

Everyone is unique and worthy happiness. It is imperative to unleash your unlimited potential in order to get everything out of life.

This requires constant work on yourself and a mandatory increase in self-esteem. But the results will not be long in coming, which will benefit both you and your environment.

9. Self-assessment test - determine the level of self-attitude today

The first practical task to increase self-esteem is to determine its level. To do this, there is a very simple test for self-assessment of a dozen questions.

It’s very easy to go through - read each item and answer "Yes" or "no"Every time you answer."Yes"- remember.

1. Do you criticize yourself sharply when you are wrong?
2. Gossip is one of your favorite activities?
3. You do not have clear guidelines?
4. Are you not physically involved?
5. Often worry about little things?
6. In an unfamiliar society, do you like to be not noticed?
7. Does criticism make you feel stressed?
8. Does the envy and criticism of others often happen?
9. The opposite sex remains a mystery, scares you?
10. An accidentally abandoned word can offend you?

Now you need to remember how much "Yes" you have been told. If less three - Your self-esteem is at a normal level. If more three - you need to work on it.

10. Conclusion + video on the topic

Having a sincere desire to change and change your life can achieve a lot. Raising, normalizing self-esteem is one of the first, rather simple steps, which allows to achieve of success, of happiness and money.

We also recommend watching the video - “How to increase self-esteem, love yourself and become confident in yourself”:

Do not spare your strength, do not take care of yourself until better times. Develop now, get invaluable experience and build your future on a new level!

If you have any questions and / or you want to share your opinion, then write them in the comments below. See you again on the pages of the online magazine "Rich Pro".

Watch the video: How To Have More Self Confidence and Self Esteem (May 2024).